MISERABLE MIDDLESEX MAULED IN MIDDLETON MASSACRE

Surrey CBA 150 (20 pts) Middx CBA 85 (2pts)

So, where do you start constructing a match report when your opening line is the result above?

Gutted, embarrassed, humiliated and totally outclassed were some of my personal feelings after a long hot afternoon’s punishment. I am sure others both in the side and on the sidelines have descriptive words of their own they could use to reflect on one of the worst days in recent Middlesex Bowling History.

On a day when everything that could go wrong did go wrong things got off to a bad start when an accident on the M25 resulted in the Team Manager, the Team shirts and the scorecards not arriving until 1350. Even worse one of the team delayed in the traffic queues was unable to make the game at all resulting in Andy Knott stepping into the breach and playing.

Team Captain John Sweeney gave a rousing speech before the game (pictured) highlighting the fact that Middlesex had beaten Surrey in the opening game of 2009 and looking for a repeat to get the campaign off to the perfect start.

Then the teams were read out by the respective President’s. Surrey’s read them out in the chest thumping style of an MC at Caesar’s Palace while his Middlesex counterpart either did not know the first name or the correct first name of the majority of his side. Since when have I been “Andy” Waller?

Anyway onto the game and on a hot and sticky day on a fast paced Shirley Park green Surrey shot out of the blocks to lead by 21 shots at 5 ends. Things simply got worse for Middlesex as the wheels came off so far that at 10 ends the game was already almost out of sight with Surrey ahead by 58 shots.

As the game progressed comments were heard about the pace of the green not suiting the Middlesex players who were more used to slower greens. Surely if you proclaim to be amongst the best players in the County you need to be able to adjust to the conditions you are confronted with and not use the pace of an opponents green as the first line of defence to explain a defeat which often seemed to be the case yesterday.

With half the game still to go Surrey’s players were starting to talk about records. Could one rink score 50 shots (against mine!), could they set a County or National record for winning margin in a Middleton Game.

Over the remaining ends Middlesex rallied, or did Surrey ease off, but either way the final result was as outlined above.

Despite the result there were some positives. Debutants Paul Reynolds (Ladygate), Alan Harman and Jim Paveling (North London) joined with Middleton Cup “Veteran” Pat Briscoe (Paddington – pictured) to beat the rink of Surrey Middleton Cup Captain Ian Honour 18-14 and secure Middlesex’s only 2 points.

There were also debuts for Ron Worley (Paddington) and 2 other members of Middlesex’s successful under 25 squad Richard Southgate (Harrow) and Ashley Tanner (Ashford).

After the game all the debutants received their Orange Middleton Cup Flash from President Graham Kellet.

So where do Middlesex go from here, do they select the same side for next weeks game against 2009 group winners Hampshire CBA, who incidentally, also lost yesterday in  their first group game of 2010 by 16 points to 6 at home to Oxfordshire CBA or do they make wholesale changes.

The only thing certain is that another performance and result like yesterday and 2010’s campaign will be over after 2 games.